Posts tagged ‘san francisco’
although i was raised by hippies and have some lovely pagan friends, i’ve never been able to use “witchy” in as fabulously flattering a way as i can when i use it for friend fifty-eight. a fellow paraprofessional at a school in san francisco, friend fifty-eight always impressed me with her caring, wisdom, calmness, beauty, and artistic talent. bringing a love of the ethereal and the natural to the students at the school, friend fifty-eight is a wonderful gift for any school to have, and i miss working with her.
i used to work with friend fifty-six, who i will refer to here as “benz,” but really only long enough to discover that he was beautiful, flirty (though not with me), and fabulous.
san francisco is one of those places full of transplants, like myself, to the point that when you’ve met someone who’s lived there for more than 10 years, you think of them as a native. friend forty-four, who i will refer to here as “annie” is an actual native of san francisco, which impresses me to no end. not only is she a native, but she went to college at berkeley, so she can give you the culinary lowdown on most places on both sides of the bay.
my girlfriend and i have been together for 4 1/2 years now. early on she introduced me to a good friend who swiftly became my good friend, too. and within a few months, i started to really wish for him the kind of love i was finding with my girlfriend. not that relationships are necessary for happiness of course, but my girlfriend and i are so happy, we wanted to spread it around. so we were thrilled when he started dating this smart, passionate woman and even more thrilled when we realized she was really making him happy. they’ve been together for a couple of years now, and it’s been great getting to know her better, too. she knows about people and places that are magnificent secrets of the bay area, and she knows how to connect to people that seem intimidating. like my girlfriend and friend forty-four’s boyfriend, she cares really big about important things, and she is a treasure for our friend. i’m happy for him and glad to have friend forty-four as part of my own circle of friends.
like many of us, when i was in high school and college, i wrote wretchedly bad poetry. my freshman year of college, i tried to get into a much-coveted poetry class with a poem about the chipped silver nailpolish of the girl i had a crush on and a statement of purpose about how i never edited anything. i didn’t get in. friend forty, funnily enough, was the person who had to tell me the news. before that, i think our friendship potential had been quite high, but after that, even though it hadn’t been her decision, i think i got a little distant. which is sad, because this smart girl with a sweet demeanor and smile and actual poetry talent would probably have been a lot of fun to hang out with.
perhaps i have the chance again. we recently ran into each other (she was with friend twenty-nine) at the sfmoma cafe, and made all of those “let’s be facebook friends and really hang out” hopes and promises. i hope it can work out.
lucky thirteen, “alice,” is a woman from my quaker meeting. her laugh and smile always makes me think she is younger than she is, which is actually pretty common for me in my meeting and in san francisco in general.
she’s really really smart in a way that one could find intimidating if they wanted. she thinks hard and long about things, and her insights are always very rich. she’s also very kind and caring and that shows up hugely in her interactions with adults and kids.
one little crimp, though, in our relationship (and as i write this, i’m thinking about how it’s funny that i am about to discuss with her this crimp via an email in which i ask her permission to put it on the internet for all the world to see. oh, the times we live in!) has to do with what i think is our shynesses. early in both of our times coming to quaker meeting, we were attending some “worship sharing” sessions. (worship sharing is a quaker term for a specific form of conversation about spiritual matters. questions are posed and participants speak out of the silence, generally only speaking once to the question until all have spoken.) we were getting to know each other really well. one day, during quaker meeting, i came over and sat next to her. this was the first time i’d ever sat next to anyone. i’d had people sit next to me, but for some reason i viewed quaker meeting as something like a public bus (stephen colbert would understand) or a school cafeteria and that you shouldn’t sit next to people you didn’t arrive with until there were no other seats available. so, at the end of the meeting, we hugged, and i said, “don’t worry. i didn’t mean to sit next to you.” as soon as i said it, i realized the ridiculousness of the statement and my assumptions up until that point. and i saw it in her face, too. “i liked that you sat next to me,” she said, puzzled by why i was stating that it was accidental.
i am not sure i’ve ever completely recovered from that. she’s welcomed me and talked with me, and we’ve been on long car trips together, but i think i broke the burgeoning bond that day and have never known quite how to get it back. obviously, posting about it all over the internet will help things.