Posts tagged ‘snazzy dressing’
although i was raised by hippies and have some lovely pagan friends, i’ve never been able to use “witchy” in as fabulously flattering a way as i can when i use it for friend fifty-eight. a fellow paraprofessional at a school in san francisco, friend fifty-eight always impressed me with her caring, wisdom, calmness, beauty, and artistic talent. bringing a love of the ethereal and the natural to the students at the school, friend fifty-eight is a wonderful gift for any school to have, and i miss working with her.
creative. dynamic. a little intimidating. someone with a very strong presence who stirs up the positive energy when she enters a room, i wasn’t surprised to learn that after we went to new college together, friend forty-seven, who i will refer to here as “april danyluk,” went to clown school. a snazzy dresser and fantastic performer, at college, if friend forty-seven was there, i knew whatever event i was at was going to have a beautiful and fun level of unconventionality. we lived in the bay area for a little while at the same time, and ran into each other at an event out here, but we’re still in that “friendship potential” stage of things.
“why don’t you sell white sage?” a customer at the independent used bookstore in the mission that i used to work at asked.
“um… well, i’m not sure,” i stumbled.
after they left, i realized the real answer to that question is friend twenty-three, “alvin orloff.” friend twenty-three, alvin, is the manager of that shop, and one of the prime reasons for why that store will never sell white sage. a low tolerance for all things woowoo matched with a deep love of all things literary and intellectual makes the idea of friend twenty-three integrating white sage into the shop’s inventory ludicrous.
one of my flaws as an employee is my tendency to chatter. this can be compounded by the way that friend twenty-three’s sassy & kitschy aesthetic represents something i’d like to achieve some day, and i had a mix between a desire to impress and a fear of appearing too “all about eve.” i was always doing ridiculous things to try to seem supersmart, hip, and fun, like writing messages in the staff book in code. and he tended to be pretty tolerant of it all.
his deep place within the sf literary scene is not something i’ve exactly coveted, but it’s definitely impressive. & one of the things that was great about working for him at the bookstore was how he makes people who work at the bookstore feel like part of the intelligentsia of san francisco. that was a really fun part of that job and i miss it. that, and talking with friend twenty-three about kitten wigs, herb alpert, and countercultural critiques.
one of the youngest people on my facebook list, i met friend twenty-five, who i will refer to here as “amanda c.,” when she came in as a high school tutor for my second-grade after school class. they loved her, a young chinese-american like them, who was smart, fun, and who sometimes came in fancy outfits that the girls really admired. i was always so glad to have her in my class because the kids related to her and she was really good with them. she hadn’t worked with kids too much before then, but i was impressed with what she did in my classroom, sometimes more than with what i did. it’s been 4 years since then. she’s off doing grown-up things now, & her enthusiasm for life in her facebook posts is contagious.
this is sort of the first “i actually feel close to this person and i don’t think i’m imagining it” post. everybody else i’ve posted about are people i like and who like me back but it’s a lot more about friendship potential than friendship actuality. the more i’m writing this, the more i’m worried that i’m dismissing the friendships i’ve mentioned thus far, but i don’t mean to– i adore those people. but i worry that the adoration is one-sided.
anyway, friend eighteen. we started undergrad together, two of the few people from the area. we always got along, but it wasn’t until one of our last years there that i discovered myself to be somewhat smitten by her verbal wit and snazzy dressing. suddenly, for a good month or so, my life was consumed with zooming back and forth between hanging out with friend eighteen, who i will refer to here as “alison,” and then rehashing every moment with my other friends, a particular fabulous queer boy in our set wanting to hear all the details via AOL instant messenger:
mE: we talked! she had an ethnic wrap!
fAbqb*!: LOL! on her head!?
mE: WHAT? no!
fAbqb*!: LOL! brb
mE: it was this vegetarian thing. i don’t know. it made us laugh. we were in the anthro lab. it seemed appropriate.
fAbqb*!: oh! LOL!
anyway, culturally appropriative food and/or headwear aside, we had lots of fun times. there were lots of field trips with my friends off campus in the middle of the night. ihop, drunkenly ordering “biscuits and gravy with no gravy” which was hilarious because it sounded like it came with a side of nongravy, after having sat on the floor of the hallway outside her dormroom, talking for hours. applebee’s all night happy hour specials that claimed to give 2 drinks for the price of one, though they were smaller than their usual drinks.
it was after a few too many grasshoppers (i actually just typed “grosshoppers”) that the crush confession was made. and in my usual style, i got drunk, confessed my crush, rejected myself, and probably cried a little. and then eventually i got over it, and we’ve stayed friends this whole time.
she’s married now and SOOOO pregnant (so pregnant that i’m worried this post, like so many others, won’t be posted for a long time, because some big baby thing will happen before she can read it and give permission). her husband’s great, they’re supercute together, and i’ve found about a dozen + crushes since friend eighteen, and i am, of course, happily coupled now, myself.
we live on opposite sides of the country, which is actually physically closer than the two years she was in japan. we comment on each other’s facebook posts pretty regularly, and she’s on a facebook group message i have as a support network. we’ve cracked each other up tons of times and she’s been there for me during some tough things. friend eighteen is a good one. no more giddy conversations in the anthro lab, but i like our friendship anyway.